Photo by Urban Vintage on Unsplash
Let’s be real—most of us are stumbling through life thinking we know what we’re doing, but deep down, we’re just winging it. That was me for the longest time. I was lost, drowning in existential dread, unsure of what I was even doing with my life.
I didn’t have a grand vision. No master plan. Just a nagging sense of emptiness and a career that felt like it was going nowhere. I had no idea what I actually wanted, which meant I was letting life make decisions for me instead of stepping up and owning my choices. And guess what? That approach doesn’t work.
In 2023, I graduated from one of the best universities in the world—NUS. And you’d think that meant my future was set, right? Wrong. The job market in 2023-2024 was a nightmare. Companies were slashing budgets, hiring freezes were everywhere, and I was stuck in this existential limbo, completely unmotivated, with no clear sense of direction.
Eventually, I landed a job in recruiting, an industry notorious for its insane attrition rate, cutthroat sales culture, and grueling hours. But not just any recruiting job—but one with a company infamous for its Wolf of Walstreet sales culture. I had actually landed the offer in March 2024 and started the job in August 2024. Between the months of securing the offer and my first day, I had countless opportunities to look for something better. But I didn’t. I convinced myself that no one else wanted me. My desire to want more for myself was nonexistent because I was still deeply entrenched in my own self-doubt and limiting beliefs.
When I started my job, I lied to myself daily, telling myself that this was where I wanted to be. I even talked myself out of wanting more because I believed that just because you want something doesn’t mean you’ll get it, right?
My friends, who expected better of me, pushed me to go for tech sales interviews. But I had already eliminated myself in my mind. I believed I wasn’t good enough, smart enough, or the right fit. I disqualified myself before even trying.
At some point, I knew that if I didn’t make a change, I’d be stuck in the same miserable cycle ten years down the road. I needed help—but as a student, professional therapy wasn’t financially sustainable. That’s when a close friend, who had been part of ThriveSg for years, introduced me to the program in February 2023 after hearing about my struggles. She saw I was searching for help but didn’t know where to turn, and suggested Thrive as a place to start. Through ThriveSg, I slowly started working on my internal struggles—primarily focused on relationship issues and generational trauma. In July of 2024, I also participated in ThriveSg’s Emotional Resilience Transformation Journey (ERTJ) course. During the 6-sessions course, I had a breakthrough when I realised that these internal issues weren’t just affecting my personal life; they were bleeding into every single area—including my career.
I realized that my self-doubt dictated my standards for job hunting. It affected what I believed I deserved. It crippled my productivity and motivation. I realised I was letting the expectations of society dictate the quality of my life and what I thought I deserved; I was the one holding myself back.
By December 2024, I had enough. I was sick of the way I thought. Sick of the way I constantly settled. Sick of believing that I only deserved so much. My mind was limiting me.
So, I took the boldest step of my life. I quit my job with no backup plan, little savings, and no sight of a better future. I just knew I couldn’t stay there anymore. If I wanted my life to change, I had to do something different.
We love to glorify hustle culture, productivity hacks, and networking strategies. But no one talks about the inner work—the self-reflection, emotional mastery, and mindset shifts that actually make success sustainable.
You can have all the skills in the world, but if you’re constantly second-guessing yourself, overwhelmed by stress, or making fear-based decisions, you’ll sabotage every opportunity that comes your way. Success isn’t just about what you do—it’s about who you are.
Thanks to therapy and inner work, I had absolute clarity—I had been lying to myself since I stepped foot into that recruiting interview. I saw a quote that said:
“If you get on the wrong train, get off at the next station – the longer you stay, the more expensive the return trip will be.”
That was all the motivation I needed.
At the point of quitting my job, I was more alive than ever. That emptiness was gone, and I had a clear vision of what my future looked like. And this time, I wasn’t letting anything—not even myself—get in the way.
I went from zero motivation to a literal hustler:
The first thing I did every morning was check LinkedIn and job sites—even before brushing my teeth. Extreme? Maybe. Necessary? Absolutely. I had wasted enough time doubting myself, and now, something had shifted inside me. Years of settling and feeling stuck had finally reached a breaking point, and it fueled me into action.
I spent at least 1-2 hours a day applying for jobs, refining my resume, and preparing for interviews. I treated job hunting like a full-time job.
I officially started my job hunt in January 2025, right after New Year’s. I had quit my job in mid-December, even before I was supposed to get my first commission check. Because nothing—not even a few extra grand—could make me stay in a job that was draining me.
To my surprise, within two weeks, I had multiple interviews lined up. By mid-January, I had over 15 companies in the pipeline.
And on January 13th, I got the email for my first-round interview with Grafana Labs for a Sales Development Representative role—the exact tech sales job I had been aiming for. Not even two weeks after officially starting my job hunt, I was in the running for my dream job.
It was funny because I had not felt this motivated, this energized, or this passionate in years. I put my heart and soul into the interview process, making sure I knew the company, the products, and the technical terms inside and out. I realized I had never wanted anything this badly in my life.
Why? Because I knew this job was the gateway to the life I wanted so clearly. But along the way, I did doubt and falter. I realized I was actually in the big leagues now—this was the ultimate test. The old me would have equated my self-worth to this job. If I don’t get it, it proves that I’m not good enough, and I should just stay in cutthroat recruitment jobs for the rest of my life with low pay and nonexistent benefits, right?
I used to think therapy would magically erase the pain and fix everything. It didn’t. What it did was equip me with the awareness, tools, and courage to finally face myself.
Therapy doesn’t save you. It helps you save yourself. So what it took to make therapy work was my commitment to the process & practising the tools I learnt in therapy, continually finding courage to attend to my emotions instead of running away from them.
When I started, I was an adult woman with the emotional maturity of a child—ruled by feelings I didn’t know how to regulate. I spiraled often, stuck in cycles of anxiety, sadness, and shame. For months, I had to see my therapist twice a week just to feel remotely functional.
There were moments I truly believed therapy wasn’t working. But maybe it was the knowledge that nothing else had worked. Maybe it was sheer grit and blind faith that things would eventually get better—or at least, hurt less. That kept me going.
It took nearly two years to heal from the wounds of my past—especially a toxic relationship that left scars I couldn’t ignore. But somewhere along the way, I stopped breaking down and started building myself up.
The turning point came when I joined ThriveSg’s Emotional Resilience Transformation Journey (ERTJ) in July 2024. That course helped me understand how emotions are formed, how unprocessed pain becomes trauma, and how to care for the wounded parts of myself instead of letting them run the show.
Therapy didn’t “fix” me. But it gave me the clarity to see my patterns, the strength to break them, and the tools to choose a better life.
Therapy didn’t just help me land my dream job—it transformed my entire life. It gave me confidence, emotional resilience, and a sense of purpose beyond external achievements.
I wake up every day with clarity, drive, and fulfillment.
And that is worth more than any job title or paycheck.
ThriveSg is looking for volunteers with like-minded vision and passion to impact the lives of our young people so they can grow emotionally & thrive significantly in life! If you would like to offer your precious giftings, abilities and time to serve with us, we warmly invite you to consider joining our Tribe to make a difference together!
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ThriveSg serves young people (17-35) from all walks of life and of different faiths. We believe that everyone has the capacity to thrive significantly when empowered and supported through growing in self-discovery, emotional wellness and resilience, and mental health.
ThriveSg champions a help-seeking culture through advocating a growth perspective towards counselling, to overcome the stigma of mental illnesses and emotional challenges.
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